I thought I'd answer some of the questions that have been asked in the comments and share some random thoughts I've had concerning this Surprise Domestic Private Adoption.
- What happens now with your Russian Adoption? Are you still going forward with Russia since your agency is now accredited? Per our agency's guidelines, if we pursue another adoption or become pregnant, the Russian Adoption goes on hold, unless we decide to cease the process. Then we must wait one year from C's birth if we wish to carry on. We have asked to be placed on hold, since we are completely paid for the Russian Adoption (other than the final travel and Russia side of things). However, it is most likely that we will not continue. At this point we can't see ourselves with 3 children. But, who knows, we may decide to continue and adopt an older girl between the ages of D and C.
- Will this be an open adoption? I guess you'd call it semi-open. Before C was born, in speaking with the birthparents, I asked them how much openness they wanted in this adoption. We decided together that we will send pictures each year on C's birthday. There is also the open possiblity to meet together once a year in a neutral location.
- Wow, D's hair is getting so long! I know this is not adoption related, but I wanted to share about this too. The pictures on the blog don't do D's hair justice. She really has golden strands throughout her hair, it is very Barbie like. Anyhow, she's been wanting to cut it, but we are growing it out long enough to donate it to Locks of Love. It has to be 10 inches of healthy hair before it can be donated. We're nearly there. She'll get a cute bob once it grows long enough. Let me say here, Flintstones Chewable vitamins help it grow faster than the Princess ones! I don't know what brand the Princess ones were, but once we ran out of those and bought Flintstones, it's like wham-o that hair (and her nails) have sprouted! My step-mother has been battling cancer and chemo and lost her hair. When D saw how Granny lost her hair, she wanted to help a child who loses her own hair to have beautiful hair like she has.
- How were you treated at the hospitals? It was amazing the respect and entitlement we received at the both hospitals. Here in our small town, before the lawyer went back to get the preliminary signatures of the birthparents (in the paperwork for us to take C to the other state to go to the neo-natal), the nurse held my hand and C's little tiny hand and prayed over us that all would go well. They let us stay with C in the baby nursery all night the first night he was born. They educated us on newborn things and I think were excited to be part of such a miracle. In the big hospital Neo-natal, the doctors and nurses were great. They saw how dedicated we were to C by being there whenever we were allowed to be there and when we left, the doctors and nurses hugged us and told us how happy they were that C is going to such a good home. They even took C to the well-baby nursery and took his newborn pictures since he didn't get any. They don't usually do that in the Neo-natal unit.
Now for some of my random thoughts.
- I remember how Debbie struggled over making their birthparent profile just right. I have thought afterward of me walking into that labor/delivery room and standing there before the birthmom in the bed, having contractions, to my right and the birthdad in a chair to my left. I stood before them and gave an impromptu, oral profile in about 10-15 minutes time! It was sur-real! The pictures I showed them were straight out of my wallet! But it was also a sweet time and a precious memory as the birthdad got out his wallet and showed me a picture of them at their wedding and a picture of their older son. I think the doctor had already told them some about us before I arrived. I remember telling them about us building this new house and how I felt guilty leaving that back bedroom just tan while D's room was being painted pink and fancy. Now we know why! It was meant for a boy and I just didn't know it.
- I've thought of lots of things leading up to C's birth that were in a way preparation that I didn't realize at the time.
- A few months ago, when we were still in the mobile home, hubby came in to the living room and said, "you know, if we ever do have a boy, how about C_ _ _ for a name?" I thought it was a "different" name, but what the heck, we're not having a boy anyhow - so sure, yeah, it's fine. Then when I followed the nurses into the baby nursery to weigh and do all that newborn stuff to C, I looked at him real up close and thought, "yep, he looks just like a C!" Right then I knew that was his name! There was no further thought to it!
- Remember how I did that online thing for the free Parenting magazine ? I had to watch a bunch of Johnson & Johnson commercials in order to "win" it. I remember thinking, it didn't apply to me, any of it but oh well, it was worth the little bit of time for the free magazines! I can't tell you how many times what I watched in those video/commercials has come back to me in caring for C!!
Ok, I've got to run for now. I've got more, but maybe I'll post it later. C is beckoning me through the baby monitor. And I've missed my napping opportunity, uh-oh!
Oh yeah, here's a pic!
4 comments:
God does have a plan even when we don't know it. I love that you already had a name for a boy picked out.
It happens as it is meant to be. Thank you for sharing all that you have.
Many times since you let us in on your "good news" I have thought of your story and it has made me just so happy.
Sweet blessings!
thanks for sharing. all things happen for a reason.
Your daughter gets more beautiful each year. I cant believe she is already in second grade. I remember her in Kindergarten
Thanks for sharing. We are so happy for you and your wonderful surprise!
We think about adopting again, but we share the same concerns about having children leaving the nest and going to college at the time we will be ready to retire. It is hard to think about, but a very real issue.
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